I’m Still Here, BTW

1 12 2006

I know I am supposed to post my ‘random’ thoughts here more often (and I do have a lot of them each day) but I’ve been busy with my day job and my two very precious blogs The Sound Palette and The Words Palette. It’s not easy maintaining two blogs that have nothing to do with your personal life. Who cares about anyone’s personal life, really? I don’t about mine.

So why have I been so lame in being a regular scribe in my own space, this blog? I guess everytime I’ve thought of writing something I’ve gone into a block of some sort – not writer’s – but a fear of not sounding articulate. After all, thanks to some fabulous writers going the blog route, we are given so much wordplay to deal with every minute of every day. Now it’s a pressure I shoudn’t have to face since I don’t have to matter. Ah, the breakthrough – ‘I don’t have to matter.’ Do I really have to have a deep insight into matters or events? Do I have to go Thesaurus diving and prove to others how vast my vocabulary is? Fuck that! Why can’t I just drop in with a video? Why can’t I drop a single line ranting, “Those fuckers are all morons”? And yes…why can’t I let it fly and swear? Swearing is good for the soul, if properly used, wouldn’t you agree? Supposed you’re sitting at your computer writing out your latest masterpiece, “Brazilian Wax: And the Britney Spears Who Loves Them” and your computer crashes, what comes out of your mouth? Not “My computer has crashed and I shall have to write it all over.” No, you say “Fuck…fuck..fuck.fuckfuckfuckfuckcukckckckckckckckckkkkkkkkkk….until you realize your fists are clenched so tight the nails have dug in your palm and a foaming of the mouth ensues with both feet stomping the apartment complex floor with a very intricate, yet lively, rhythm commonly found in the opening measures of a death metal song. The ‘k’ letter from fuck turns into a rapid fire assault, barely clutching on to the vowels. At that point any vowel would have done fine, but the new color of your face has scared them off. Alas.

All is not lost, however. You realize you’ve managed to, through an unforeseen accident of technology (the compuuter crash in this case), let out all your pent up anger and frustration. You let a few moments pass. You’re gradually breathing normally. Your heartbeat goes back to it’s boring, but vital, rhythm pattern. The magenta hue is disappearing from your face, but not before your discover a tad change in your make-up routine can truly bring out the color of your eyes. You find your shoes previously taking flight under the bed. “Ah…there’s my iPod, I thought I lost it.” You’ve pulled yourself and the chair up. You sit down and start all over – now focused and asking a whole set of new questions about the post you set out to write. No, you still want to write about Brazilian Wax, but you question yourself for a moment, “All this rage from this?” You click ‘New Post’ and write the first words of a post that brings in monster traffic to your site, eventually letting you give Google Ad Sense a shot. All I’m saying is, cursing is normal. It doesn’t make you a bad person. It makes you very popular among normal people. Curse words are not just words, they are the perfect sounding expression of your anger and frustration. But one must not abuse the privileges of swearing. Use it wisely. Don’t hurt someone with those words, although you will be tempted to and it is quite easy to do. Instead of saying, “You fucking piece of shit” to someone and ruining their day (or not) and your image say, “This shit is fucking awesome!” and make a bloggger happy. Instead of saying, “You philosophizing son of a bitch,” say “You Freud-fucking son of a fucking bitch.” Okay, I see the positive angle is not working here.

Sometime ago I read this book on advice given to actors doing Shakespeare and this teacher (I forget his name) uses curse words to teach students how to emphasize on certain words in a text. For example, how would you say, “To be or not to be, that is the question”? How about inserting ‘fucking’ before a certain word and then see how the dynamic changes? My turn: ‘To be or not to be, that is the fucking question.’ Now when I say this out loud, I notice I wasn’t emphasizing on ‘fucking’. Instead I was on ‘that’. Now eliminating ‘fucking’ I always hit it on ‘that’. Brilliant!!

So my friends, and people who can’t stand me, I’m still here.




One response

28 03 2007
Free Your Mind and The Ass Will Follow. « EMONOME

[…] not answer that…now. Now I am about to write whatever comes out of me, good or bad. I have done this before and will link to that post at the end of this post but not at the end of this post. You will find […]

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