Call 911, TV Is Dying!

16 01 2007

I was watching the commercials last night with the Golden Globe breaks in between. Talk about mutual masturbation and meat auction that screams “I’ll suck your dick for a holler.” Almost every face that popped up on screen looked so desperate and eager for approval and kudos that I started to feel embarrassed for them. Some of them clearly didn’t want to be there but were so it would give them exposure and help the movies/TV shows sell. And what happens? I switched off before some ‘genius’ editor tried to fool me into thinking Warren Beatty somehow deserves a Lifetime award by randomly flashing clips from a body of work of…10 films. Why does Hollywood Foreign Press needs to kiss his ass, again? Chances are, you haven’t watched the show in the first place – or maybe you have to ogle at Jennifer Love Hewitt’s cleavage, or Helen Mirren’s. Each year the cleavage depth seems to go deeper and deeper. Next time I lose my remote, I know where to check. Chances are you were watching ’24.’ Chances are you like the empty space your TV used to occupy to place your laptop and control your entertainment. ‘I don’t own a TV’ used to be accompanied with a tear rolling down the cheeks of poor people, but it’s becoming a statement of luxury and pride.

Tell me, what part of Internet democracy some of you still find confusing? The eyes, the peacocks, the alphabets, and the wild animals are clutching on to the last few straws, but they still dominate and violate you writers, actors, directors, producers etc etc. With so many means of production and distribution, why do you need Hollywood’s permission or money to create and share your work? Why do you still gloss your lips so shiny that Hollywood needs a towel to wipe its behind. Networks: you can move to HD (when?), keep cancelling shows you should’ve never agreed to pay for in the first place, dance with the stars, mock average citizens on air, or pretend you really like YouTube. You know your end is near. Find your burial ground now because it will get crowded with the likes of you. You do know who’ll follow to the graveyards with you, don’t you: the Guilds, the Unions, the Associations, the Leagues? Yes, they’ll be next and they feel it too. Why am I smiling too much as I write this? Ask anyone with a computer and a high-speed Internet connection and a zero tolerance for your bullshit.

I should tell you that I had a different title for this post, a different angle and a really lame theme to follow it. But I kind of lost it after writing the first 14 words. I’ll never work in your town again? If I gave a fuck, my friend, I’d be devastated to hear that. 🙂

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